Archive for the ‘Speen’ Category


The quiet reconning

5 avril 2019

Still, she sits.
The hours are, she could not ignore them even if she tried, she feels every second weighing on her soul and heart. The stone beneath her is cold and hard and yet she moves not. For she could not, so heavy are her thoughts, and indeed, what is the point.
She has uselessly fought the wind, it has cought her hair and twirled and whirled, her ears deafened by ancient screams echoing her mind.
She has resisted, she has gone to war and refused defeat… her energy, her life, the world, she won’t be dictated.
So much time, so many battles and insignificant inches won… despite her oaths, tonight she feels she can not go on.
To understand what has defeated her she knows not. Was it a single second or the sum of her disappointments? She has realised she does not care anymore.
Still, she sits, at the top of a hill, and the valley beyond she contemplates, her mind wondering with what may have been her defeats and what she has learned.

It is a bittersweet reconning, she cannot be sure of what she has won or lost, tonight is neither a surrender nor a victory, rather it is a still moment in time, she is wiser than yesterday and yet unsure if tomorrow could be kind, and she has wants, freezing on the cold stone dominating the world, she fights back her tears, her anger and words, and softly nurses a small flicker of hope, her strongest weapon, for from a flicker grows a fire, a storm, as long as a door remains open, still and quiet and strong, she will succeed, tomorrow, after tonight’s sorrows she will thrive.



18 mars 2019

Tu plonges tes yeux, tu ne sais plus, si près du feu et les bouteilles vides, tu as un peu froid d’un côté et tu brûles de l’autre. La soirée s’est étirée en longueur sans que tu t’en aperçoives, le verre entre, ni plein ni vide, les chaussures trop serrées comme ton cœur qui se coince contre tes poumons à l’asphyxie. C’est bien pour ca, l’alcool, la chaleur, les heures d’oublis en brouillard de toi-même. Personne pour te rappeler de respirer, te secouer de ta torpeur. Seul entouré d’âmes perdues, aucun échec possible, plus bas n’existe pas. A force, ta tête dodeline contre le dossier de ton fauteuil, tu aimerais imaginer des conversations sophistiquées mais c’est si compliqué, l’énergie s’évade… au final tu abandonnes le train de tes pensées.

Ici rien ne compte ou n’existe, tes problèmes te retrouveront dans doute au au réveil. En attendant tu te perds dans le ricanement d’un spleen, sans rien attendre, en larmes d’abandons.